House Of Horror

Storyline

From TV Star Parade: "Nobody, but nobody, is safe from the witty but acid tongue of Tarantula Ghoul, a cross between the Charles Addams woman and a "road company" Tallulah Bankhead, who welcomes viewers to her House of Horror in Portland, Ore., on Wednesdays (10:30 P.M., KPTV). She attacks the Highway Commission for removing the few decent death traps left, assails the City Zoo Commission for not exhibiting prehistoric animals, kids the D.A.R. with her own organization, the D.S.W.T. (Daughters of the Salem Witchcraft Trials). She's active in the Black Cross, lectures on Second Aid and keeps her finger in the political pie through her party, The Cemeterians (which boasts more ex-presidents than any other political group). With an occasional assist from Milton, a retired grave-robber turned gardener, Suzanne Waldron clowns up the Tarantula role enough to win family acceptance for the show. Taranch, as she's known off camera, introduces the films either with a special set or from her "home" -- a weirdly-decorated room overlooking a run-down cemetery (which she refers to as the neighborhood) and a patio where she an Milton "plant things." For Frankenstein pictures the lab was recreated for her entrance from the operating table. For the Mummy films she made her entrance from a mummy case. For Murders in the Rue Morgue she did the show in French with English sub-titles. King Kong was presented as a satire on This Is Your Life with a large studio audience of costumed monsters paying tribute to a live chimp, Kenya, an alleged great, great grandson of Kong. A native of Portland, Suzanne describes herself as having been "depressingly tall, thin and shy" during high school. But at Highland University in Las Vegas, New Mexico (sic?), she discovered the value of individualism -- which she had. Ironically, her first dramatic appearance was as one of the witches in Macbeth. After college, stock and touring shows, she returned to Portland to do radio commercials. Since the horror show started in October, 1957, Suzanne's been carted around in coffins, appeared with gorillas, held press parties in cemeteries, etc. Her most embarrassing moment -- she fell asleep in a coffin and did NOT arise as scheduled for half-time ceremonies of a nationally-telecast football game. Her most frightening time -- appearing on stage with an 11-foot boa constrictor which, at the last minute replaced the smaller, less active snake she was used to. In her free time Suzanne reads and listens to hi-fi in an apartment she shares with an overly-friendly Great Dane named Frankenstein. She likes people, all kinds of music (she made two R 'n' R records -- "King Kong" and "Graveyard Rock"), dancing, art, skiing, riding, and surf-swimming. She still does commercials and spoofs the Movie of the Month, looking ahead to the day the horror craze joins Davy Crockett, but the way things look now, that may be a long way off.